Life is full of demands, and in highly stressful circumstances, self-care often takes a backseat. However, self-care is not a luxury—it is a necessity for sustainable well-being, particularly for those in vocational Christian ministry or other demanding professions. Without intentional self-care, burnout is a real risk, leading to diminished effectiveness, compromised well-being, and potentially even the inability to keep doing the work that you love and find so signficant..
“Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”
Jesus did not promote constant busyness. He modeled self-care through rest, prayer, and solitude, knowing it was necessary for long-term ministry. True self-care honors God’s design for us as integrated beings—body, soul, and spirit. It is a practice of stewardship, ensuring that we can continue to serve, love, and lead with endurance.
Keeping the Soul in the Story: Why Self-Care Isn’t Selfish
Life is full and often beautiful—but let’s be honest, it can also be exhausting. Whether you’re in a caring profession, raising a family, navigating work demands, or walking alongside others in times of need, it’s easy to find yourself running on empty.
You want to be present, purposeful, and grounded. But how do you keep your soul in the story when life feels more like survival than flourishing?
That’s the question I’ve been living with lately. My work in pastoral supervision is deeply relational—it involves holding space, listening deeply, and helping others reflect on meaning and resilience. I love it.
But at the same time, I’ve been navigating a season of personal complexity: supporting family members, tending to my own mental health, and trying to stay connected to what nourishes me in the midst of it all.
And here’s what I’ve come to realise: caring for your inner life isn’t optional. It’s essential. Not just so you can keep functioning, but so you can keep showing up—with heart, with hope, and with wholeness.
The Inner Life Matters More Than We Think
A study I came across recently explored what sustains people in high-demand, people-focused roles. The results were striking: it wasn’t better time management or even external support (though those help). What really mattered were internal resources—things like a sense of calling, a connection to something greater, and a secure inner foundation.
In other words, what’s going on inside often matters just as much, if not more, than what’s happening around us.
That deeply resonates. When I think of times I’ve felt most grounded, it wasn’t because everything was going smoothly—it was because I stayed close to what nurtures me: prayer, journaling, meaningful conversations, silence, creative expression, good therapy, morning walks. These aren’t luxuries. They’re lifelines.
What Self-Care Really Looks Like (Hint: It’s Not All Bubble Baths)
Self-care gets talked about a lot these days. And yes, warm baths and a quiet cup of tea absolutely have their place. But deeper self-care is about rhythm and intentionality. It’s about practices and boundaries that remind you who you are and reconnect you to what matters.
In this season, I’ve had to pay particular attention to that. Sometimes self-care looks like early nights so I can do some early morning exercise. Sometimes it’s a hobby while listening to a podcast that speaks to my soul. Other times, it’s saying “no” to something good so I can say “yes” to rest—or to just not being needed for a while.
One of the biggest things I’ve learned is this: you can’t wait until life calms down to develop a care plan. You need one in place before the storm hits. That’s been a hard-won lesson.
Faith, Flexibility, and Rhythms of Grace
For me, faith is a big part of this. Not in a rigid, performative way, but as a grounding relationship. There’s a quote I love: “You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep others warm.” That speaks especially loud if you’re someone who cares deeply—for people, causes, communities.
Faith reminds me that I’m not the whole story. I can trust. I can rest. I can be human.
And I’ve come to believe in flexible care plans—ones that allow for stress, grief, and change. Rigidity is just another pressure. Real care listens to the soul. It allows for ebb and flow.
These days, I’m building in mini-Sabbaths, protecting creative time, and prioritising relationships that bring perspective and grace. Because the truth is: self-care isn’t a detour from your purpose—it’s the path to staying in it for the long haul.
When any of these are neglected, we don’t just get tired—we lose our way. But when they’re honoured, they become the soil where joy, creativity, and resilience can grow.
Why Self-Care Matters (Especially for Those Who Hold Space for Others)
Self-care isn’t self-indulgence. It’s about stewardship. Stewardship of your calling, your energy, your mind, body, and spirit.
Effective self-care supports your resilience in four key ways:
Professional Well-Being: Staying competent and connected to meaning in your work through reflection, supervision, development, and boundaries.
Psychological Well-Being: Knowing how to self-reflect, regulate emotion, and manage stress.
Spiritual Well-Being: Cultivating connection with God and nurturing a faith that sustains rather than depletes.
Lifestyle Well-Being: Paying attention to sleep, exercise, nutrition, and the relationships that fill your tank.
Common Barriers to Self-Care
Even when we know it’s important, self-care can feel out of reach. Some of the most common roadblocks include:
Time Constraints – Feeling like there’s no room for yourself amidst everything else.
Financial Limitations – Seeing self-care as a luxury rather than an investment.
Family or Relational Demands – Putting others’ needs so far above your own that you disappear.
Spiritualised Burnout – Mistaking self-neglect for sacrificial service.
But here’s the truth: you can’t give what you haven’t received. Sustainable service requires sustainable care.
Self-care is not selfish — it's an ethical responsibility, especially in ministry, leadership, or caregiving roles.
Developing a Self-Care Plan: The C.A.R.E. Model
To create a sustainable self-care plan, consider the C.A.R.E. framework:
Consider Core Values – Align self-care with your deepest convictions and what truly matters to you.
Assess Current Practices – Reflect on strengths and gaps in your current self-care routine.
Record a Sustainable Plan – Create a structured yet flexible plan for improvement.
Evaluate and Adjust – Regularly review and refine your approach to maintain balance.
Developing your own CARE plan - together
Would you like support in creating a meaningful and sustainable self-care plan? This short reflection is designed to help you pause, take stock, and plan your next steps with intention. Set aside some quiet time to read through the questions—perhaps more than once—and let them sit with you. When you're ready, complete the self-reflection and then book a 25-minute mini session. Your responses will be kept confidential and together we’ll explore your answers and shape a plan that works for your current season.
Implementing and Evaluating Your Plan
Set three small, realistic goals for the next few months.
Identify potential barriers and how to navigate them.
Establish review dates (eg perhaps once a month) to assess progress.
Keep your plan visible and actionable, using reminders or accountability partners.